Building Resilience: Increasing Optimism

The main quality possessed by resilient people is an optimistic outlook.  Optimists tend to see their problems as short lived, changeable, and specific to circumstances.  By contrast, disposition or habitual pessimists see their problems as permanent, persistent, and pervasive.  Pessimists tend to blame themselves for setbacks and failures, where optimists tend to look elsewhere for the reasons or causes.  Some people seem to be born with the gift of optimism but extensive research studies have shown that optimism like helplessness can be learned. 

The first step in increasing optimism is to begin disputing pessimistic assumptions.  The steps to doing this are:

Describe a recent disappointment or event as specifically as possible.  Describe how it made you feel about yourself and your role in the event.  Now answer the following questions

• What are alternative ways of viewing the event, especially those that are changeable, specific to circumstances, and not personal to you?
• What is the worst-case scenario?  How bad is it really?
• What are the consequences of holding on to this negative belief about you? 
• How do you feel about it now?

Here is an example:

Setback: Chair wants another revision

Emotional response: this kind of thing always happens to me.  I must be a terrible writer.

Evidence: remember the times when your writing was accepted.  What is the evidence that this always happens to you?  Think of your successes and when things were going well.  What is different now?

Alternative viewpoints: I can get some writing help from the writing center or from my friend who was an English major.  Can I see this as an opportunity?  Perhaps I need to rethink how I am approaching my writing.

Consequences (of holding onto the pessimistic thoughts): become passive and negative.  Increase the likelihood that I will be unable to write.  Feel frustrated.

Feel now (consequences of changing thinking): less helpless, more ready to take charge and manage this.

 

Today's mini-Montana photo break is of snowstorm in the Spanish Peak Mountains south of Bozeman MT. Next time, we'll consider building resilience further by looking at re-framing problems. Do you have an issue or a question that you would like me to discuss in a future post? Send me an email with your ideas. leann.stadtlander@waldenu.edu